01 JanEpisode 109 | Annie gets a puppy: On navigating Petfinder, vetting breeders, and falling in love with a new dog
Two months after losing her 15.5-year-old Yorkiepoo bestfriend, Annie and her family welcomed a new puppy into their home. In this episode, she talks about the experience of falling in love with rescue dogs on the Internet, conversing with breeders charging top dollar, and, finally, landing the perfect puppy for her family.
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Transcript:
[Intro and music]
Annie:
Hey folks, it's New Year's Day. And I only have a short window of time to record this while my in-laws are at the playground with my daughter. I actually had a different episode lined up for today. Kind of like a business lessons, behavior-minded business lessons of 2020 episode I was going to do.
But at the last minute I decided instead I wanted to share that there's some big dog news in my life that's happened in the last week, which is that I got a puppy. And I thought while this event is still quite fresh, I would talk about it. We got her on Tuesday and today is Friday. So it's really only been a few days.
So as regular listeners might know, I lost my beloved 15 and a half year old Yorkie poo Amos about two months ago, November 3rd, after a swift illness. And I had him for most of my adult life. He really shaped who I am. And so it was a big loss, big loss to recover from.
And it didn't feel right away like, okay, now we need to get a new dog. I just kind of thought, I'm just gonna let this settle, see how I feel. Don't need to rush into anything. And my husband was like, why don't we wait a few years? And I thought, I don't know if I can wait a few years. I mean, this is my life, dogs are my life. The house feels empty without a dog.
Plus I realized I've only ever had one dog. I mean, I had dogs when I was a kid, but like since being a dog trainer, I've only ever had one dog. And when I got into dog training my dog was already five. So I've never had a dog who I've trained from the beginning. And the more I thought about it, the more I felt kind of like, gosh, am I fake? Am I a failure that I've only ever had one dog?
I mean, I've certainly trained many dogs. I've spent extended periods of time with many, many dogs, but I just felt like, I think it will benefit me to be in the trenches with a new dog. That experience can only benefit my understanding of dogs in general.
So I started looking on Petfinder, just kind of like scrolling through Petfinder every now and then. And I also sort of meditated on who have been my favorite dogs that I've worked with over the last 10 years. Specifically, I was thinking about what small dogs have I worked with that have come from breeders. Because I was open to getting a dog from a good breeder. I really believe in supporting good breeders that have very high standards. I was also open of course, to adopting a dog, just exploring all the options.
SoI I knew one breeder who breeds miniature poodles, upstate. I've worked with a couple of dogs who've come from her. Red Teddy poodles is the name of the breeder. I think it's in Hudson, New York. I think she does a great job. Really, really wonderful dogs. She does genetic testing, which I think is super important. She keeps things really small, very exclusive about who she sells to.
So I corresponded with her a little bit and she said she would let me know if she had a litter. Of course she has a waiting list, but she said she’d put me on the waiting list. And I did that sort of thinking it could definitely be a year of being on that waiting list.
I looked into a Shih Tzu breeder. I don't actually love Shih Tzus that much. They're not my favorite breed, but I have one Shih Tzu, Violet who is definitely one of my all time favorite students. Really love, love little Violet. I didn't actually contact her breeder. I looked on the breeder's website and just didn't get a good feeling about them. Didn't feel like it was up to my admittedly high standards. Although she is a wonderful dog and quite healthy. So I kind of passed over that one.
Then I reached out to a Norwich terrier breeder who bred a little Norwich terrier named Max who I dog sat for for extended periods of time when he was a puppy. And I just loved this little dog. I love terriers in general. I think I love their like attitudes and their little bodies and the way they move. And this little Norwich terrier really stole my heart.
So I contacted his breeder and also felt very good about this breeder. I think she breeds both retrievers and Norwiches, and just seemed like a breeder who really focuses on breeding for health. Did all the kinds of genetic testing that I think are important.
And then she called me a couple of weeks later and said that she had a litter, three girls, and that if I wanted to put down a deposit, they would be ready to take home in February. If I wanted to drive down to Virginia, which I would be happy to do. And she was asking $6,500 per puppy,
And, I'm not particularly good, I would say — I'm pretty good at justifying any expense and also good at putting large expenses on like 0% APR interest credit cards and paying it off over time. I've done that before with some big purchases. So the number didn't totally throw me off. It did seem like a lot of money. I certainly have a lot of clients who I know have paid probably between three and four, maybe $5,000 on a dog.
I mean, I don't generally have those conversations, but occasionally I'll see receipts when people give me their paperwork to show their dogs’ shot records, et cetera, et cetera. So it was a number that was higher than I was expecting and higher than anything I've seen. But I don't know.
I don't get too attached to money, I guess. And even though I do not have $6,500 laying around, I was not totally put off, but, you know, I am married. [laughs] I have a family to consider and my husband was just like, absolutely no, no way, no way, no way, Jose, are we spending $6,500 on a puppy. And I wasn't really going to have an argument about it cause it really is a huge amount.
I just, I don't know, I kind of rationalize things and I feel like it didn't get the impression this person was like trying to fleece me. I just sort of thought if she's asking this much, her puppies really must be worth this much. She must really be doing something right.
And it's funny, I was texting with Chris, the owner of this little dog Max, who I love so much. He said actually, when he got Max, the price, which was like six or so years ago, it was half as much, but that he recently got another puppy from the same woman and that the price had doubled. And then for like a week, he was like sending me all these adorable photos of Max and his newer puppy Griffin. I was like getting puppy porn on my phone [laughs].
Anyway. So I was vetoed on the very expensive Norwich terrier. Then on Petfinder I found a dog named Guppy who was like a petite, beautiful brown pit bull. And I love pit bulls. Pit bulls, are not a specific breed, just general kind of umbrella term for a dog that kind of looks a certain way, and they're one of my favorite kinds of dogs.
I actually did have a pit bull briefly about 13, 14 years ago, who I lost in a breakup that we found on the street actually as a puppy. So big, big part of my heart is reserved for pit bulls. My husband does not live pit bulls. I think he's a little racist against pit bulls, actually. It's a problem as far as I'm concerned.
But this dog Guppy had three legs and it was just young and adorable. And I thought like, there's no way my husband can dislike a dog with three legs. Like, the definition of the underdog. And also gup is a word that my daughter says a lot. Sometimes it means cup, but I think sometimes it's just something she likes to say. So I was like, Gup, Guppy, it's a sign.
So I wrote to the rescue and they said, if you're interested in Guppy, you can fill out an application online. And I was like, well I’m happy to fill out an application. But like, does it really make sense to be filling out an application if I've ever met the dog yet? Can I come meet Guppy to make sure that it's a right fit, and then I can apply? And the responses I got were just kind of curt basically being like, if you want to meet Guppy, you gotta fill out the application. So I filled out the application and then just kind of sat back and waited for the phone to ring.
And a week passed and I didn't hear anything. And eventually I messaged the shelter on Instagram, the rescue on Instagram, and said, Hey, has Guppy found a home? And they wrote back, yes, Guppy’s already in a home. And I was sad. Like, I'd already pictured this dog I'd never met in our lives.
Then a week or two later, I found a younger dog, a puppy named Sophia Loren, a rescue. It's like a rescue group out, like on the East end of Long Island. This dog was part Tibetan terrier, part old English bulldog, just sort of like a little stout, fluffy dog. I thought that was such an interesting mix. And this place, I had to pay, I think it was $15 to send an application, and I did.
And you know, these applications, they're so in-depth, and one thing that's interesting is they ask for your landlord's information, I guess to confirm that you're okay in your building to have a dog. Which I get, but I don't know, I live in a rent stabilized apartment and if you're familiar with rent stabilized apartments in New York City, they're like these valuable things, like, you don't want to mess anything up.
Like, we almost never call the landlord for anything. It's just a very hands-off sort of leave us alone relationship. They have no interest in us being in this apartment because of the ridiculously low rent that we pay. And so I dunno, I mean also like my landlord, it's not like a person with a name. It's some LLC, some nameless LLC, and I'm not thrilled with the idea of them getting random phone calls from various shelters vetting me.
And I don't really know if these places even call the landlords, but anyway, I put the landlord's information there and everything else they wanted to know. I feel like, you know, I'm a pretty good candidate to adopt a puppy. Again, didn't hear back about Sophia Loren. Reached out a week later or so, and was told that she already had a stack of adoption applications and that I was somewhere in the stack, but probably someone else was going to get her.
Then on Petfinder — and again, I wasn't looking too seriously. I was just kind of scrolling through when I just needed a break from doing other stuff, and I saw this dog named Layla who was like a super shaggy, like, I think two year old dog. I was mostly looking at puppies, but this one came up, a blonde terrier, looked like Sandy in the movie, Annie. And I don't know. I just was like, that's our dog, that's her. I just had this, this overwhelming feeling of like, she's the one.
I emailed about her and I'd actually heard back right away. She was being fostered in New Jersey by a woman who runs like a foster network. She pulls dogs, I think mostly out of the public shelter in Newark. And she was like, she's really pretty fearful, skittish. I don't know if she used the word skittish, she said fearful.
And she said, normally I wouldn't think it would be a good idea for her to be in a home with a dog, but you're a dog trainer. I mean, being in a home with a kid, but you're a dog trainer so clearly know what you're doing. You just really can't yell at her. She gets super scared and upset if you yell at her. So you really can only use positive reinforcement. And I was like, okay, well, I got that.
And my husband was not enthusiastic about this when I explained the situation and described her having possible fear issues. He was like, I think we should get a puppy. I don't think we should be getting a dog who has any issues. And I totally felt where he was coming from and didn't think he was wrong, but I just had this overwhelming feeling of like, she's our dog, she's our dog!
So we drove out to, I think it was like the Jersey shore. I was like two hours away. It was like an entire sort of Saturday activity. And the woman fostering this dog lived in a beautiful house. It was amazingly clean and pristine considering that she has like six dogs of her own, and was was fostering like five other dogs and a bird and a turtle and cats, and God knows whatever else.
And she was wearing a mask. I was wearing a mask. My husband was wearing a mask. He was carrying our daughter. And my husband is like a really big guy with a beard. Which I am only mentioning because I think like just the whole thing freaked this dog out so much. The foster lady said, you know she's never seen me in a mask. So I wonder if she's just spooked by the fact that I'm in a mask.
But here, like she was in a mask and there were these three masked strangers, one a child, one this big bearded guy.
[dog barking in background]
I'm getting to you, I haven't talked about you yet. I'm leading up to it.
Anyway, this dog was just so spooked. She could not be within 10 feet of us without cowering and running in the other direction. It was clear from the moment we walked in, pretty much, that it wasn't going to work. And the foster was like, you're the dog trainer. You should narrate how this goes, but I was just sort of like taken off guard. It was not my house. I just met this person. I just met this dog, like sort of dictating how the whole thing was going to go. I felt like, what is, is that my role here? I don't know.
And so we weren't there very long, but she did at one point, kind of drag this poor dog over to me, so I could pet the dog. And the dog did let me pet her, but she was so terrified. She peed herself while I was petting her. It was just a very sad situation. And I felt like, I wish I could help this dog who I think had just been kind of raised from puppy hood in someone's backyard, just totally neglected. But it was also clear to me that we were not the right home for this dog.
I mean, the woman fostering her said she was really bonded to her and that she got over her fear of her in a day or two. But I thought, even if we could win over this dog, this terribly fearful dog, and even if I could work with her in our home, it just wouldn't be fair to bring this dog to live with us in central Manhattan. Where you know, we live on like a busy Avenue. I just couldn't picture that dog on the street.
So we drove the two hours back home, and both my husband and I just felt sad that we couldn't help this dog, but it also, like clearly the right thing to do was to not take the dog.
Then I started chatting with some of my staff and clients and friends who are in our new community app, and sharing some of the dogs I was seeing on Petfinder. I just started sort of talking more about my experience trying to find a dog. Again, I wasn't like feeling any kind of major urgency about it. Just more and more kind of thinking like, more and more interested just in the whole process of especially getting a rescue dog in this moment, where apparently it's just harder and harder to get a rescue dog. Because more and more people want dogs, which, which is a good thing.
And I don't know how much of it is rescues being very just vigilant about who they give dogs to, or how much of it is just demand outweighs supply. Anyway, it's interesting. I was reminded actually of this one time. I actually worked at, it was a dog daycare, but they also were kind of like a rescue organization in Greenpoint. I worked there actually while I was doing the Karen Pryor Academy for a few months in 2010.
And I remember there was this beautiful gray petite rescue pit bull there that I was just in love with, and I was telling my neighbor about this dog. He wasn't even really like looking for a dog, but he was just really like a solidly good person who wants to do good things and help people and help dogs. And he was like, Oh, well, I'll take her if she needs a home.
So he showed up at this rescue, like Hey, I'm here to adopt Sasha. And the people who ran the place were like, Oh, well, — I mean, she'd been there for months. They were like, well, if you're interested in her, you're gonna have to fill out an application and this and that. And he was just like, Oh, I thought I was coming to get a dog.
I think even though this is kind of a world that I'm in, I was still sort of surprised by how many hoops these places make people jump through. And again, I don't know if that's like a bad thing, I think can just be sort of surprising. I could, could tell more stories about working at that place, but trying to stay on point.
So I started in our new community app, which you can download go to schoolforthedogs.com/community, or look up School for the Dogs Community in the app store. I was just kind of venting a little bit. And Anna Hayward, who is one of our apprentices who I interviewed a few months ago for the podcast, super interesting woman.
She does a lot of fostering. And one of the groups she fosters with specializes in small and medium sized dogs. They bring up a lot of dogs from down South, and Anna was like, what I suggest you do — they're called Waggy Tails. She was like, I suggest that you like go to waggy tails.com or whatever the website is. I should say exactly what it is now [laughs]. Just in case anyone else wants to see what it is. Let me see. WaggyTailsRescue.org is what it is.
She said, go just fill out an application so that you can be pre-approved. And then if a dog comes that fits kind of what you're looking for, you'll be at the top of the list. Because they don't even post their dogs on Petfinder or wherever anymore, because they get so inundated with applications.
And actually I think this is probably a good tip for anyone looking to adopt. Find a good rescue and rather than applying to a specific dog, just reach out to them and let them know that you're interested and available.
So I did that. And I said, I think we'd like like a small to medium size puppy or young dog. Some kind of terrier, ideally something kinda like scruffy. Jason, my husband was saying his ideal dog would be like the tramp in Lady and the Tramp.
And like five days later or something Anna texted me and she was like Waggy Tails just got in three Chihuahua mixes from Alabama. They're sisters. They're not scruffy, but they're about, five months old, would you be interested? So she sent me photos and I said, yes, sure!
So that was, I guess on a Saturday or Sunday, I think Sunday, maybe. And Monday I had a phone call with the woman who was fostering two of these three sisters. They were brought to a shelter in Alabama, actually with their parents. Their parents though I think were not surrendered by whoever brought them in, they were brought in to be fixed. So I actually got to see the three girls and what their parents look like, which was kind of cool.
And had this conversation. There were two dogs available and I said I would love to meet them. Of the two I picked the one that had kind of like a — two of the puppies were sort of all one color blonde. And one was a little bit darker with a black face, sort of like German shepherd coloring, actually. Like a large size Chihuahua terrier mix with German shepherd coloring.
And Tuesday she came and dropped off this puppy for half an hour. You know, another funny thing about adopting a dog right now is like, there aren't adoption events. It's hard to go into people's homes to meet their dogs. So it was this sort of like funny puppy drop off situation where she said, you know, take, take 30 minutes an hour, see how you feel about her. And then if you're into her, you can fill out the paperwork and pay the fee.
So that's what happened. And that's how this new girl came into our lives. She is — I haven't weighed her, but I'm guessing she's something like 15 pounds, about five months old. Very, very adorable. She looks kind of like a meerkat to me, like the meerkat and the, in The Lion King. And a little bit older than I ideally would have liked.
I think if you're getting a puppy, best to look for a puppy that's you know, in that socialization sweet spot of like 10 ish weeks. 20 weeks is kind of actually like our cutoff at School for the Dogs for a lot of our puppy offerings because the socialization window really kind of starts to close at like 12 weeks, 16 weeks.
But this is a Bulletproof puppy. I don't know how she got this way, but she is super chill, not spooked by anything so far that she's encountered. Very sweet, very tolerant. My daughter who's two is of course obsessed with her. And this puppy is perfectly content to be snuggled and pet by a toddler. Very cuddly, very kissy, pretty bonded to me already.
And she really just settled in. She just settled in like she's been here forever, even though, like I said, she came Tuesday, today's Friday. It's really only been a few days, but she seems very happy and comfortable. And we love her.
It's such a funny thing when you get a dog, cause it's kind of like an arranged marriage. Like most relationships you like can kind of tiptoe in and see how you feel, like a friendship or, you know, a romantic relationship. You're not just like signing on from the beginning. I mean, like I was saying, like at this one place, I was expected to fill out the adoption papers without ever meeting the dog. And I was willing to do it.
I remember when I got Amos my old dog, him sitting on my lap in the car on the way home. And I was just thinking like, what if I don't like him? Like, I've committed to this for the next, like 10 to 20 years. I hope I like this dog. And you know, of course we tend to like them because dogs are so fricking lovable and great.
But they're these like full fledged people, I mean, not people, they're dogs, but like — it's different also, with like a baby, like of course you don't choose your baby. I loved my baby from the moment she arrived, but it was a kind of slow ramp up, experiencing her as like a fully fledged person.
Whereas this dog is who she is already. And I signed on after only knowing her for 30 minutes and decided that we're going to be the people who are going to be her providers for the rest of her life. And I think it was a good choice. I'm really really enjoying her.
We're still trying to figure out a name for her. My husband and I have been disagreeing, which is funny because like we came up with our daughter's name with like 30 seconds of discussion about that, and we've been going back and forth for days about what to name this puppy.
I want to name her Poppy. Partially because the day that we got her, my daughter started saying puppy and she's two. So it kind of sounds like Poppy. And it's notable because she only says like, I don't know, eight words total, and four of those words are like baby-ese. Like not really real words, like she calls doggies woo-woo. So I think it's kind of cool that she's already saying what basically sounds like Poppy.
But my husband thinks of Poppy as like, I dunno, like what you call a grandfather. Or like P-A-P-I, “Hey Papi,” as opposed to P O P P Y like the flower. So he's been pushing for Sally or Phoebe, but I think he's maybe coming around to Poppy. Also, the nice thing about Poppy is it's a flower, and our daughter is Magnolia, so that's two flowers in our home.
And yeah. Gosh, what else can I say about this adorable little dog? It's just amazing to have this loving, affectionate creature around. And I keep thinking she's like grateful. Like I keep feeling like, Oh, I think she maybe knows she landed in a good place.
I mean, when you think about just all the things in life that have to happen for a dog to end up really in any home, like all the tiny things that made it so this puppy from God knows where in Alabama ended up in my home and in Manhattan, and all the people that had to be involved, and all the circumstances that, that had to come together. It's pretty amazing. So I, I keep feeling like, I don't know, like she's, she's grateful and lucky.
But then I remind myself how much of personalities, like dog personalities. How much of it is our projection. Projecting onto them and just like we project onto people, no two dogs are seen in the exact same way by any two people. And is she really grateful or not? I mean, I have no idea of dogs feel gratitude.
But the fact is like, I don't think dogs know if they came from a pet store or they came from breeder or they came from a shelter. They might've come from difficult situations. No matter where they came from. They might've come from nothing but good times, no matter where they came from.
When you do get a rescue dog though, I mean, really when you get any dog, unless you're there, the moment they're born, there is kind of this history that you'll never totally know about. But I do know that she was with her two sisters up until pretty recently. She was being fostered with one of her sisters.
And I do know that she spent about two weeks in this foster home with this lovely woman who is the person who brought her to me. Who told me she is a great little great little puppy, all at least three puppies have no problems. They're super sweet. Everybody loves them. And I can totally, totally see why. So definitely I'm glad that things have ended up where they have, and that we're starting this, this new year with her.
I'm sure I will have much more to say about her and to share about her in the coming weeks and months. But some initial observations from three days of having a puppy for the first time in 15 years.
One thing is it's definitely not the ideal time of year to get a puppy if you ask me, if you live in the Northern hemisphere. It is cold and this little girl has no interest in being in the cold. She is some kind of Chihuahua mix. They do hail from warmer areas.
I have bundled her up in doggy sweatshirts a few times and brought her out on my deck. I have a fenced in private outdoor area and she clearly is uncomfortable, so I haven't pushed it. I haven't tried bringing her out on the street yet either just because I want her to settle in. I want her to feel comfortable about all the things. And when you're in a new place and you're cold I think you're not going to be doing your best learning.
But it does make it harder to think about socializing her to the outside world. And of course I think it makes it harder to house train a dog if it's hard to just get them to be comfortable in the outdoors. So my choice right now is just not stress out too much about the house training stuff. I have wee wee pads down in one specific spot.
And I'm reminded of how important it is to manage space. This is true of any dog you're working with, but when you're working with a puppy in particular, and especially if you're dealing with house training, you really want to control the environment, control the space in order to make sure that your dog has lots of opportunities to go in the right spot and not a lot of opportunities to go in the wrong spot.
So fortunately, because I already have a toddler, I already have a pretty good baby gate game in my apartment. So I mostly am gated off in one area of my bedroom, sort of where my desk is, with the puppy and her crate and some wee wee pads. So she doesn't have to go very far if she's hanging out with me in this area to get to her wee wee pads.
I'm using the Revol crate, which is the crate that we're big fans of at School for the Dogs that we use at our studio. Again, just a really nice way to manage space. If your dog is in the crate. I know she's not also going to be, you know, peeing on the rug in the other room. I've rolled up most of our rugs, but we do have one big rug in our living room that we're just keeping her out of that room unless she has just emptied herself.
But loving using the Revol crate because it opens up on two sides and on the top. So it just makes for like a really nice kind of open air dog house for her, where she can chill out without necessarily having to be fully enclosed in it all the time. I have closed her in and she's fine with that. She's very chill. I got a very laid back girl here.
Hilariously my daughter is really living the crate for some reason and has been crawling into it with all of her dolls. Pretty funny.
What else? Also have been getting a lot of use from our flirt pole. I've been using the squishy face flirt pole, which we do sell at storeforthedogs.com, but we put up a blog post recently on how you can make your own flirt pole. A flirt pole is basically just a really big cat toy, like a piece of PVC pipe with like a rope or bungee cord on it at one end and then like a toy at the end.
It's just such a great thing, I'm using it while I'm sitting at my desk recording this to just get her to run around a little bit. She's jumping from the bed, my bed to her bed. She's running in circles. Puppies need to play, puppies need to get out their extra energy. And again, it's hard when it's cold out. You got to do this stuff inside.
And especially during the pandemic when it's not so easy to arrange copious play dates with other appropriate puppies. I think this toy is worth its weight in gold. If I really get her going with it for like five or 10 minutes, she will then conk out for two to three hours.
And you can use it in training, you know, I've been using it with her to work on — basically we've just been working on sit and touch so far, but I like sometimes using toys instead of treats, or mixing up toys and treats.
I guess the last little thing that I'm reminded of spending the last few days with a puppy is that training can happen throughout the day in little bursts. I don't feel like I have to set aside an hour a day. I don't feel like I have to be following some kind of plan. I'm just kind of wearing my treat pouch, and periodically when I feel like taking a break from whatever I'm doing, I will spend two minutes clicking for sits, or working on her touch cue, which is basically just teaching her to touch my fingers.
And also just tossing things in her crate. I've been doing a series of claps and then tossing things in her crate. Crate is right next to my desk right now. So super easy to do that. I've been clapping five times and tossing something into her crate. And I'm hoping that before very long she'll hear me clap, wherever she is in the apartment, and she'll know that that means good stuff is going to happen in her crate.
She's very interested in spending time with me, so it hasn't been hard to get her to want to hang out in the crate, because the crate is right next to my desk where I spend much of my time. Anyway, I look forward to sharing more about my new pup and getting to know this special individual who's been assigned to me for the rest of her life, I hope.
And yeah, I guess that's it. Happy New Year to everybody. I will see you next week.
[Outro and music]
